NMSU Guide to Residential Living 19
Roommate Relations: Tips for Being a Good Roommate
• Set clear expectations from the start. You know your own preferences and idiosyncrasies, but your
roommate is just getting to know what it’s like living with you. Don’t expect them to be a mind reader. If
you can’t fall asleep with lights on, hate scary movies, have a particular snack you’re not willing to share, or
get grossed out by toothpaste in the sink, let them know from the beginning so you can work together on
what it means to be roomies and avoid a blow-up over unmet expectations that were never stated.
• Respect your roommate’s space and belongings. This is a major cause of roommate conflicts each year
that could be easily avoided with a quick discussion early in the year. People have different ideas about
what’s ok to borrow, share, or use, and how frequently. For example, borrowing your roommate’s bike
once because you’re late to class may be different than asking to use it four days a week, or worse, taking it
without asking. Each person varies in how comfortable they are with others sitting on their bed, using their
items, or sharing household goods. Don't be afraid to be honest about what you prefer not to share; it will
save a lot of heartache and conflict down the road. Discuss these things openly and honestly early in the
year to establish what’s ok and when.
• Be responsible for your guests. You may enjoy having lots of guests visiting, but your roommate may value
privacy. Pay attention to how often you invite friends and classmates over. If you and your roommate have
different preferences, try alternating which days or times that friends are welcome in the room and when it’s
time for quiet.
• Lock your doors and windows. Imagine how terrible you’d feel if one of your roommate’s prized possessions
got stolen when you were down the hall and left the door unlocked. How would you feel if the valuable item
stolen was yours, and your roommate was the one who stepped out? Locking your doors and windows is one
of the best ways to stay safe on campus and be a great roommate.
• It’s OK not to be best friends. Having a great roommate relationship does not depend on being friends. You
may end up close friends with your roommate, but having your own social circles can strengthen the
relationship you have with your roommate and prevent you from spending every hour of the day together.
• Keep an open mind. Your roommate may have different customs, beliefs, or ideas from you. Be open to new
experiences: learn about where they come from, what they believe, and what’s important to them, and share
these things about yourself. Learning about yourself and others is a big part of the college experience.
• Shift your perspective. Before you make assumptions about your roommate’s thoughts or intentions, take a
step back and try to imagine their point of view. Talk to your roommate and listen to what they have to say
about where they’re coming from. You may not always agree, but this will help you better understand each
other and open your mind to different opinions and experiences.
• Share responsibility for cleaning. People have different comfort levels with clutter, and the tidier you keep
your space, the more comfortable everyone will be. Especially during the COVID-19 health emergency,
frequent and thorough cleaning and disinfecting of your room and shared spaces will help keep everyone in
your suite, apartment, or home safe. Keeping the space clean is everyone’s responsibility, and keeping each
other healthy is one of the best ways to be a good roommate.
Roommate/Suitemate Agreements & Space Changes
All roommates and suitemates will be given the opportunity to complete a Roommate/Suitemate agreement
early in the fall semester. In the event of an interpersonal conflict, we expect that all students will abide by
the roommate/suitemate agreement, including having an adult conversation with their fellow residents,
before discussing the possibility of switching residential spaces. Room change options may be limited, and
are granted on a last-resort basis outside of our open transfer period each semester (see Room Transfers).